This week I had a wonderfully relaxing four day break in Crestview. This time was necessary for me to get through the rest of the semester, which I am not looking forward to. At this point I just want to be done with USF, because I feel pretty sure at this point that Tampa is not the place for me, and research is no longer a passion of mine. However, I am going to do my absolute best for the next few weeks and make sure I finish this semester with flourish. I want to make sure that at the end of my year of absence, I would be welcome to come back if I chose to do so. It’s good to live your life in a way that leaves you with options if possible. Burning bridges unnecessarily can limit your future. So ultimately, I’m spending today just getting my head back in the game as much as possible.
I applied for a new position in Crestview to work within the Families First Network. With my degree I am qualified to apply for a higher position, but I chose to apply for an entry level (with a bachelor’s degree) position. I have always been interested in social policy and civic activism–especially in terms of vulnerable populations. I want to start from the bottom of the ladder and learn as much as I can about every aspect of the system. I think this will make me a much more effective leader at higher levels as I work my way up/out/around the system. Also, I don’t want to start out in a leadership position, and then realize this place is not for me. This year will be a trial run to see if this kind of life is the more rewarding sort that I’ve been looking for.
I know a lot of people may not understand my not being fulfilled at USF after having worked so hard to qualify myself for a good Ph.D. program. As analytical as I may be, I’m a sentimental person as well. If I don’t feel somewhat passionate about what I’m doing, or if I feel like I’m not part of something that really contributes to the betterment of society–it is very difficult for me to stay focused/interested. Luckily, I have the luxury now of being a bit picky about the direction I’ll take in my career. I’m just thankful that most of the feedback I’ve been getting is positive.
This is where I am for this week. This is pretty much all I’ve been thinking about–other than not fitting into my favorite dress pants anymore that is. This whole pregnancy thing is really inconvenient lol. Luckily I have a very supportive family that I cannot wait to live closer to in just a few weeks. Prayers are appreciated. 🙂