It’s Gonna Be A Good Life~Audrey

I don’t do New Years resolutions. I’m against the whole idea that we’re going to change just because it’s a new year if we don’t have true motivation for the change. This does not mean that the New Year is not a time to reflect on you life and look at things you want to change. I applaud those people who know they have changes to make and the New Year gets them kick started.

My friends and did a ritual in which we wrote down things from this year we wanted to leave behind and then burned the list. I am always not huge on sharing on things like this-even to them. The reason is the number one thing on that burn list: insecurity.

You would think after my recent promotion at work, I would feel secure and accomplished. But as I transition into a new role and start to handle additional stress, I am actually feeling more insecure. I’ve made some mistakes and that are making me rethink everything. This, compounded with by the fact I have been physically, sick has gotten me questioning myself everywhere even with friends and family.

When I was myself questioning things around my friends, I knew I was in trouble. It was time to deal with my lack of confidence and handle it like an adult woman. So I burned that list; burned that insecurity. I’ve decided that the mistakes were learning tools. A new position has a learning curve no matter what position or job it might be.

My co-worked and I were discussing this the yesterday. She was concerned about learning her role and adapting. So I confided in her that I was too. Right then we decided we would help each other adapt and encourage each other.

So as I go into the New Year, I vow to stop second guessing myself. To let my mistakes just be mistakes and not failures. To truly know in my heart that my girls loved me for whom I am, and wanted to help me with my mistakes.

As I walked away from the fire that night, I knew that this life long struggle with insecurity wouldn’t be easy to be beat, but with work I could do it. It was gonna be a good life.

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  1. #1 by Renee N. Chaffin on January 6, 2012 - 8:47 pm

    I LOVE This.. and I am so proud of you for sharing that night. I know how that is for you and I have def seen you grow since we did this rad7even thing..you are radical my dear 🙂 Wherever God places you..you shall flourish not because you’re so good, BUT because He is..He saw something in YOU something that MANE needed and you are exactly where He would have you right now. Yes, the journey won’t be easy, but believe me, I know you’re def built for it. LOVE YOU hun

  2. #2 by Venus on January 14, 2012 - 4:57 am

    Hey Audrey! I don’t do resolutions either! I just think its stupid if a person is not going to stick to them! Anyway I’m glad you left the things you needed to leave behind last yr! I think the burn list was great to get out emotions! I also deal with lack of confidence (so pray about that). I hope that you continue to grow and learn in you new position! ~Venus

  3. #3 by radical7even on January 15, 2012 - 4:06 am

    I’m so proud of you Audrey! You are growing into an even stronger woman. You deserve to feel secure in your hard-earned abilities. 🙂 Love you bunches! -Kelly

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