One of my goals this year to keep up with my good health-physically, emotionally, spiritually. This includes working on my stress levels and finding peace. Forgiveness something I have been working hard on. There are apologizes I want to acknowledge but can’t say it to certain people’s faces. I refuse to be pulled into the drama of their lives. So instead, I am going to make them public. I have three people to forgive and two people I am praying extra hard to forgive.
I was young and stupid and paid dearly for my indiscretions. You were much nicer to me than most of them. I was fifteen for what it’s worth. But I forgive you for going after my best friends. I forgive you for cheating on my best friend. I am sorry to my best friend who I shunned. I forgive her too. I realize now you weren’t trying to hurt me, you just wanted some kind of connect. I shouldn’t have done what I did but neither should have you. We are never getting back together.
I forgive you for you immaturity. For being so wrapped up in your family you couldn’t look to the future towards a new family. I apologize for trying to steamroll you while I was trying to break you of that. I did more damage than good probably. You’ve got potential, and I hope you use it. I hope you use it. I wish you well. We are never ever getting back together.
My first true love. You treated me like a possession, shared me with your friends, always put their needs before mine, and stalked me after our final break-up. You were not in a good place and neither was I. In our disgust and depression, you did things, and I took them. But I have forgiven you and moved past that. I am sorry for my part in all that mess. We are never ever, ever getting back together.
I am working hard to forgiving you. You are a sociopath. You didn’t care if you hurt me. The thrill of lying to me, of stringing me along, the thrill of not getting caught. I am having trouble forgiving you because you tried so hard to hurt me. You meant to. With God’s help, I will find it in my heart to release myself of this pain because I know it doesn’t bother you. We are never ever, ever, ever getting back together.
You kept the fact that my boyfriend was cheating on me. You told every friend you knew for “advise.” This just spread it around more, and I was the last to know. I pray each night to let go of the resentment I feel for that humiliation, and, more so, the breach of trust. I forgive your other offenses: putting your boyfriend first, for being a horrible co-worker. But the betrayal still stings. Girlfriends are supposed to have each other’s backs. You go talk to your friends? Talk to my friend? Talk to me!
*Names have been changed to protect the guilty