I’m often amazed by the wide range of personalities that I am raising. With my three biological boys I knew parts of their personalities before they were born. As sick as I was with Darren, I remember his gender ultrasound and how I literally just came from the restroom getting sick as a dog and when he popped on the screen his hands were behind his head…chilling. Nothing seemed to shake him; same thing after our terrifying birthing experience. He latched immediately for nursing and once in my room the next day…smiled at me!
Daniel my first born…he’s emotional and dramatic. I remember leaving him in his bassinet at around 1 month old to take a 10 minute shower. When I got back he was howling like a coyote and had even busted a blood vessel in his eye…in 10 mins. I remember thinking…what did I get myself into. 7 years later…he still has knee jerk reactions that we are working on but he is also a sweetheart. Thats the thing about him feeling things deeply both positive and negative.
Now Lennon, my rainbow baby (a baby born after a loss) he is…Lennon. it’s hard to describe my old soul child. He can make basketball shots on a 10 ft goal, can sing his alphabet and count to 20 (skipping 4 and 17) …but one thing Lennon is not is social.
Huge social scenes stress my little guy out and up until recently he’s avoided many of those scenes. But today…today Lennon started school.
We sang songs, we hyped school up… yet he howled and sobbed when we dropped him off. Adjusting is hard and I see so much of myself in him. The apprehension to speak up, the timidity when it’s time to step up.
I used to be so sure of myself and somehow that’s gotten lost. It’s time to become my little social butterfly self and teach my kids as well.